quick update

Haven't really been poling all too much. Did a bit just now, wow it gives me a sweat, plus I'm still a little sick so it makes me cough so much. Ugh I wish this sickness and nerve pain shit would go away!!! My arm is so annoying. I have to keep it straight as much as possible because of the nerve entrapment. It's hard to when I'm trying to sleep. But when people curl there arms up while sleeping it can make it worse and cause it? If you bang it bent I guess. Anyways its hard to stay away completely but I can still do one handed things. Some floor work and walking. I just wish I felt better I'm still sick its been a whole week!!

My fucked up arm blog.

When I first set up my pole about to weeks ago, I hopped right on it and did some moves. ( It took us a whole day to fix our ceiling and get the pole to fit in my little basement) So I was just so happy to try it out. I know now NEVER EVER EVER..... eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeerrrrrrrr to pole when i'm not warm. I have had many arm and joint issues. My knees constantly crack my wrists have been busted a few times and over all I can just see me hoping on the pole as a creeky bad idea, yet I did it.

Now I don't remember the exact "action" or thing I did to hurt my elbow but I think it was just a bang on the elbow. It hurt at first but I didn't think it was a huge deal.

But the next day my elbow was pretty sore I would move it side to side and around thinking by forcing it to move around and being able to handle the pain (my pain tolerance is very high I've been know to have a broken wrist for a week before I get a cast... aggg rugby ) so i was moving around and it did that tight pain thing but I didn't think it was THAT bad. Then a few days later my wrist started acting up. Sort of sore yet my elbow felt fine. I couldn't move my wrist back and forth (sideways). I but a wrist splint thing on it and that helps me force it not to move. If I don't have something on it I forget and use it like I never hurt it.

So the wrist hurt a little and now I get strange pains in the elbow and my pinky and ring finger is tingling. I knew then I hit a nerve.

Now it only hurts when I'm trying to sleeping and the way i try to position my elbow and arm. I can move my fingers and everything and right now i just took off the wrist splint and my hands seem fine. Its just one way I move my elbow or wrist and bang the tingling and some uncomfortable feelings happen.

I went to the doctor and he told me I hurt my ulnar and It will take a long time to heal :( He brushed me off and didn't tell me much except to keep resting it. I basically have been doing all my research online ( which is SO SCARY) some sites talk about forever damage other carpol tunnel. Ugh I just don't know the EXTENT of the damage. Did I really really eff it up or if I rest it for a long time will I be good again? Or is this tingling and pain just something else to add to my long list of pains to learn to deal with.

I feel like im living in a 50 year old body and I'm only 19 :( I have had so many injuries the past 3 years that by the time i am 50 i;ll be so stiff. That's part of the reason I wanted to pole, to keep me in shape and keep me flexible so I can not feel 50 when I am 50 :( now I have pain in my hand like a old person..great

This ulnar injury is really making me upset. I just got my pole, i see people poling and I want to go practice. I want to go to the gym but I cant lift with my arm and I don't want my right side to get all worked out and have a weak left arm:(

I'm just happy its not on my good arm but still. I can't lie I've still been on the pole. Not using my left arm but trying and learning my known spins with one hand. But still I wanted to put my 110% into poling and going back to working out and now I feel like I'm 2000 steps back. Plus to top it all off I have the NASTIEST cold right now. Which is just awesome cause you know the weather is great yet I'm dying.

I just don't know the extent of how I should rest it and how its going to effect pole. This just sucks.


Sorry for the depressing self pity tone but really I'm just so upset I could cry I'm such a BABY when :( I don't or can't get what I want boo :(

MONDAY! ITS PARTY TIME!

So today is my bestest frotch friends 18th birthday! My little Ginger is finally 18!! We are celebrating with drinks, good times and STRIPPERS!! Yes so excited to go to Sin City tonight. I like Sin City and have a good (and bad!) memories at that place. Not the nicest looking strip club in town but I think its the best in terms of drinks, good times and over all strippers. Although there are some pretty pathetic strippers in this city. I've only seen ONE that I actually liked and of course that was at Sin. Seriously I could do a better job dancing and such, but I don't think anyone other then my baby Steve can handle looking at me naked.EW.

Also Sin City is the first strip club I ever went too and the first time I saw strippers. That really good stripper I saw really actually helped inspire me to start to Pole Dance. Although I have no plans on being a stripper and getting naked I love the dance and sexual aspect of stripping. She was so good she jammed to ALL Metallica which I liked. She had an awesome black leather outfit and BOY WAS SHE HOT! She did alot of actually pole work and climbs,inverts and spins. I loved her. I hope there are some good rippers tonight. Not the usual ugly broads who walk around the pole and do lame ass walking back and forth dancing. Ew.

Anyways so we are all heading over there tonight for A GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD TIME. As of my own pole work well I'm still hurting. My arm is still messed but. I;m convinced there is something up with the nerve. I hit my elbow on the pole. Then for a few days my elbow hurt and it was uncomfortable to move it around. Then the elbow stopped hurting and my wrist started acting up. I couldn't move it side to side with out a weird uncomfortable feeling. Now they both hurt a little every once in a while and my fingers are getting werid pulsing tingling feelings. Ugh so much stress, plus I'm sick as a dog. Been coughing non stop, sore throat, head aches. THe whole nine yards. Thankfully I have a doctor appointment today at 4 so I hope he can get to the bottom of all this arm shit.

Still forcing myself to go out because I haven't "partied" with my friends for a while. Although I definitely cut back on my partying ways I still like to have a good time every now and then. Especially when we can go to the strip club and I love when I can have a night out with my man and my friends!! Plus i'm feeling a lot better and it's only usually at night when I start to feel really sick, when my body is trying to sleep. ugh.

BRB. Got to go wash out my hair dye! Yes I dyed it just a natural dark brown to match my roots, they were bad! My other brown faded so much in the sun!

Anyways I gotta go get ready, seeing the girls quick, picking up my crap from the psycho Alisha Gemmels house and then the doctor!!

so sick, just relaxing all day

So I'm very sick it sucks. Oh well shit happens I guess It just makes me so tired and sore. Like my throat is in mad pain, and my head keeps hurting. I think I'm stressed and ugh. Oh well life works in mysterious ways. Well see what happens.

So I poled a bit last night, a bit today. Taking it slow, my arm still is hurting. I'm not wearing the tensor and la'cota shit. Steve took it back. Oh well. I'm pretty sure no one reads this except my mom and Steve now. HI STEVE! HI MOM!

ha ha ha. So I poled and it felt good, it's a good stress reliever and when I do a long period of it I get such an awesome workout. I've been stopping once my arm starts hurting and focusing more on my good arm. Ugh. Wish I still had my tensor. We'll see might go to the doctor if it's not good in a few days. It sucks cause I already have a bad wrist in my right arm that I messed up 2 years ago in rugby. Really my bones are a snapping!!

I did a little of Jamillas The art of pole dvd today. But I feel so sick I can't even look at the moving on the screen. Ugh. Awful. I need to go read some more. It doesn't hurt my head! By the way....

I'm loving LOVING the new Eminem album. Recovery. LOVE IT!! Been relaxing to it all day. Great people on it with him! Rhianna, Lil Wayne, PINK!!! I love it! Frick so worth the 15 bucks I paid for it on itunes. DO IT NOW!!

Anyways I feel sick NO MORE TYPING. Later.

Another boring, useless day in the world of Miccalicious

Ah so I blog once again. Frick so many things are running through my mind. I'm seriously considering running away to Portugal. I have enough saved for a one way flight. I would be able to meet my little brother for the first time. I need a vacation. All I'm waiting on is my mom to answer since it has to be okay with her cause it's work on her part too. I have to stay at her house, I have to eat. I don't want to be to much of a bother but I still want to go. Ugh I hope I can figure something out.

finally got a pole!!

So I finally got my very own x pole!! So happy about it too. Only bummer is I banged my wrist as soon as we finally got it up and now I'll trying to stay away. It's hard I still practice on my good arm. I can manage a front hook/ballerina spin one handed now. Which is so great cause I remember first trying it and being so bad I told my teacher. "I'll never get this", and now not only can I do it when my arms both are good but I can do it one handed on my right(dominat) side. WOOO Poling makes me happy, just wish the pain in my wrist would go away!

Anyways so my pole is a 45' TG X-pert Xpole. I LOVE IT! Its thinner then the standard size pole but I love it anyways. It's not like it would be impossible to learn back to a 50' like when I was at Studio's but Vanessa will be teaching me for a while and she teaches on it. It's better for gripping with your hands but harder with your legs! But I'll master it don't worry!

I had to take out ceiling tiles and put a piece of ply wood on the joist to fit the min height of 7'4 for my pole to fit down here. This will be good enough for now and once I need more space and am that good I'll hopefully have my own place. I have pictures of Steve setting it up for me. It took a a day or so because at first I was trying to put it upstairs and the adjuster got stuck and I needed Steve's strong muscles to turn it. He promised to make it work down here and he did. I thank him for that but he's really pissing me off right now so I don't give 2 shits about him.

Now I'm just planning what I'm doing with my pole space. I want to cover up the ply wood and gap in the roof. Also want lots more mirrors. The one I have is only like a bit of the pole so its hard to see what I'm doing sometimes.

Also wanting to buy Studio Veena lessons but I won't till I have more cash and my wrist it healed. Ugh I hope it fixes up soon. It was in a good tensor thing but Steve thinks it makes sense to wake me up at 230 am to come get him wrist tensor and arm guard thing I've been wearing for a while because I hurt my wrist. Ya cause he needs them so bad, I bet he hurt his wrist lifting the cooler with all his clothes and shit the FIRST time he woke me up tonight to give him his shit. He is bi polar I swear. I just can't handle it. He is crazy. I always take him back but I think I really need to move on. Its hard because he is my first love but still he gives me a head ache.

Boys are dumb. Oh well I have pole, that's my good friend. Doesn't piss me off like my crazy boyfriend and crazy psycho bitch ex friends. Drama seriously stay away from me. I want to just run away and start a new life somewhere. Not knowing anyone. Forgetting everyone and just making new friends and relationships. Just living care free. This city is suffocating me and I feel like I'm digging and digging myself into a hole I can't get out of.

Now its almost 4 am, Steve has woken me up about ten times tonight to be a psycho fuck tard and now I think I'll try to get to sleep. I think I'll start blogging more. This helps me relax and get my mind of the CRAZIES!! Ha ha Oh well. More to come!!